The church building was like a welcome sight to a weary traveler. The Christians who met there every Sunday morning had helped to raise me since I was born, with the compassion and love that they afforded to their own children. I could not have asked for a better place to grow up, under the care of the brothers and sisters and the love of the Lord.

This was the last Sunday meeting of the semester. I had missed every Sunday meeting since the beginning of that term of college, but today I was determined to change that. Excited to see all the familiar faces, I rushed to the front door ahead of my family. But I paused, considering the thoughts that people would have about my absence.  

As I waited for my family in the lobby after the church meeting, an older brother walked up to me. A smile spread across my face. Ever since I had met him 5 years prior, I had always looked up to him for his love for the Lord and the saints around him.  

But today I was not prepared for the things he had to say. “We missed you last weekend,” he remarked. I didn’t respond because I didn’t remember what I missed. Taking my silence for confusion, he kept implying, “Oh, I’m not surprised you forgot.” Just then I remember that I missed a Christian college conference because I chose to spend my weekend with my friends from school. I felt bad for having missed it and wanted to defend myself, but he kept talking.

Our conversation ended with a strained handshake and an uneasy smile. Both of our passive-aggressive remarks did nothing to help our relationship. He had questioned my decision and intentions when I joined my social fraternity. He had questioned how much I understood myself and my strength to not be consumed by a fraternity life. It seemed to me, as though he doubted me as a person. Hearing someone that I admired say those things about me hurt. I didn’t know quite how to make him understand, but I did know that both of us only had one side of a two-sided story. He did not know my full intentions for joining my fraternity, and I did not understand the concern he had on his heart.  

Nevertheless, on the car ride home, I could not help but consider his words to me. I began to reflect. What was I, a Christian who loves the Lord, doing in a fraternity?  

This is the story of an experience I had in college. It is a story of when I found myself in the wrong situation for my Christian life, but by the Lord’s mercy, I was able to find and know Him somewhere I did not expect.  

Growing up in the church, I have witnessed certain actions being labeled as wholly good or wholly bad. Especially when I went off to college, I was faced with making important decisions without my parents or older saints. When I began college, I asked some older brothers, “What should I do when I find myself in a [blank] situation.” I was given a lot of good advice that would help me walk with the Lord. “Go to meetings,” they said, “read the Bible and spend time with the saints.” They told me the things that they wanted me to do, but with that, they included some things that they did not want me to do. “Don’t go to parties” they said, “don’t do drugs and do not join a fraternity.”  

Before I go further, I don’t want anyone to get the wrong impression about me. I am not supportive of Christians moonlighting as party-goers on the weekends. I will be the first one to tell a younger Christian not to join a fraternity. And yeah, kids, don’t do drugs, drugs are bad. And parties aren’t the best place to have a Bible study, the lighting is dreadful.  

It is easy to view a fraternity as simply a way for adolescents to release pent-up emotions while partying and doing drugs. But the group I joined was a bit different. Yes, I won’t deny that they threw parties quite often, but as the semester progressed I grew to call them my friends and care about their wellbeing. Gradually, as we spent more time together, I grew to let little rays of the Lord out of me. I would always jump for the opportunity to talk about the Lord or my church. When they would ask what I was doing over the summer, I would tell them of all the serving that I would be doing with my church and what it meant to me. I would be so excited when they asked me about the Bible or God. And I made sure that they knew I was a Christian.  

A story in the Bible often came to mind when I spent time with my friends in my fraternity.

In Matthew 9, Jesus and his disciples reclined at the table with tax collectors and sinners  

10 And as Jesus reclined at table in the house, behold, many tax collectors and sinners came and were reclining with Jesus and his disciples.

And as Pharisees saw Jesus spending time with sinners, they faulted Him by asking His disciples,  

11b “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?”

Jesus responded to the Pharisees with this explanation:  

12b “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. 13 Go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.’ For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”  

When I consider my friends in my fraternity, I see people who need the Lord, but how will they come to know Him if I withdraw myself from them?

The initial decision to join my fraternity at the beginning of the semester came from a desire to try something new and because one of my closest friends was already a member. But on that day when the older brother called me out for joining, I had a different thought for why I was in it. I realized that as a Christian, my role as a member of my fraternity was to be a light to my friends. Even though I was in an environment that went against the values that I was raised in, I realized that I could be a source for my friends to come to know the Lord.  

I am not perfect. I cannot say that I am an unstoppable force for the Lord in my fraternity. I do the best I can according to the grace and ability that was given to me.  

I think that the advice to stay away from this kind of life is well-founded. Most of the time, someone who joins a fraternity looking to fill a hole within themselves does find something to fill it. But what he fills himself with only brings him further from the Lord.  

I don’t write this to try to defend myself or to convince you to join a fraternity. I just want to tell a story of someone who found himself in the wrong situation and environment. But by the Lord’s mercy, was able to find and draw closer to Him, and perhaps, cause others to find Him as well.  

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This is the first of a series of testimonies concerning my spiritual journey with the Lord in college. The coming articles will elaborate on some topics I alluded to above as well as bring in new ideas.